bleh.
(copied from a madagascar postcard btw)(mouseover it)(colourin sucks lol)(shape of molecules notes! haha)(well truth to be told, in place of "CCJC" i put "NO STEAK?!" n a lil scribble of a piece of steak. when i came to drawin the NYC of the flag i added the J and erased the steak haha.. so i'm not tt loyal to the sch haha)

it's be nyjc all decades what. why fix what's not brokened? i rmb they told us to banish all thoughts of the uniform being changed cos it's been as such all these years. and then. they're gonna change the name NYJC to CCJC. sissyjc -_-. sounds horrid. but worst it's like. no more nanyang jc. gone. the graduate said the board of directors have already decided on it. hope the petition works :S

i think there'll be a big uproar when they annouce it. Prolly "boos". i imgine the chanting/cheering of "N(clap)- Y(clap)- J..C(clap chap)~". and then we sit on the track in protest, refusing to bulge. (perhaps cos we dont wanna proceed to attempt our midyr paper! lol)

shadows (of branches/leaves) on umbrella are nice. i mean, when you're holding the umbrella under the blazing sun (boy it was freaking hot today).

a rare short post. lol.

long long time ago, when i was young

okok, not that young..

long long time ago, when i was young


i experienced my first brush of "love" ^^;;

i was what, pri 2/3 n had a interest in origami. quite a number of ppl in my class did too so we kinda fuelled each other's interest haha..we usually folded before flagraising.. wahhaa. supposed to be "silent reading session"

there was this guy and we used to spend recess together, teachin each other origami haha(like some model i cldnt do n some he didnt).. one day while walking along the corridor (nxt to the xing shui shi yuan rock!)he tried hold my hand (!!) me being the shy lil gal i was (was prolly shocked mayb), slipped my hand out but he tried again n i didnt do anything haha (i'm not sure if i did the slip my hand out thingy really happened or it was me dramatising stuff when i wrote it my diary a few yrs after it happened. i dont recall what really happened now, except where we were haha).. i dont remember that i felt then too haha..

looking back it was all pretty cute, two kids holding hands, walking around/folding 60cents colourpaper frm the bookshop.. haha we talktalktalked lots during chinese lesson when we all sat on the floor to listen to the chinese teacher (mayb tt's y my chinese so crappy lol)

his mom used to be at the parent's corner sheleter place..mayb bring lunch. i remember she told me not to buy stuff for him. lol. we was quite silly, buyin stuff frm the bookshop tt he wanted (it was kinda vice versa actually)..

i used to pretend he died to cry for fun (o_0 cry for fun sounds really wierd)..lol. lucky mom didnt like walk into my room when i was crying. [once i was on the phone with yun qing (another classmate) and imagined the worst fates that those puppies in school would be destined too (knocked down by cars la etc) and we wld cry. mus look v wierd, two gals crying on the phone at some makebelieve scenrio lol. btw no we werent sick sadistic ppl. we loved those puppies. but that''l be another story haha.]

i think we talked so much that the teacher split us to one right at the back and one at the front. but both on the extreme left of the class, next to the two doors... so we used to say "teacher, can go toilet?" den on the way, stop by the door to chitchat a while lol!

was it love? i did like him n stuff i dunno. when i hear of primary school students having steads, i always think it's ridiculous- "so young know what is love meh? haiyo, they all arh, watch too much tv". but there i was. haha.. ^^; the irony. i do know it was very innocent and rather sweet hee.

i think around pri4, one day he said "i dont wan friend you anymore". wah.. xin tong arh. i think he wanted to play/run around w his guy friends n stuff..

then pri4 changed class loh. i think i watched him play tabletennis sometimes haha. and gave him my extra spiderman stickers (i had this spidybook thingy.. hv to collect stickers which come randomised in packs n paste it in.. so of cos lots of extras. yeah, i love spiderman as a kid[cos he wasnt like other heros who were born w abilites- more real (thou how real can superheros be aint lol)]. n he's super witty. and he's smart. he invented his webshooters k]. well i still read the bimonthly comics haha.)

totally lost contact after pri school.

towards the end of sec 4 in popular jubilee, i saw a familiar person reading the doublesize spiderman comics (diff frm the series i read thou haha). my heart skipped at beat, seeing him doing something that links so close to the past. it was the first time i saw in him what, 6 years. wow. lol. he looked the same except he had grown so tall(well compared to my mental image of a pri 3 boy). he still remembered my name. "emily" yes. my name's emily. lol. flustered me mumbled some rubbish n left w/o exchanging contact number. boy i was dumb. nvr again to see him liao.

then. the next day at the library, mugging for the o lvls. guess who i was to meet. yes. after not meeting him for 6 years, i meet him 2day in a row. he was w friends.. i could feel them talking abt me.. u know, can see them sneakin look and nudgin him when i left seat etc.

that day was a very unproductive day of studying (how to study.. lol) so i decided to leave early. on the way out i popped by his table to say bye n he asked my number =D (like finally lol). exchanged a few sms (he said wanted to catch me outside for a short chat but i came over first and says he thinks we used to do origami last time) but after a while he didnt reply o_0.(later he said he had ran out of the month's free sms -_-;)

so that was that.. for a week or so, he studied at amk then disappears as suddenly as he appeared.

i wonder if he remembered us in primary school. a classmate once told me she had a very close friend who took the same sch bus at her in pri sch but didnt recall a thing (he was in her sec3/4 class..). ah. heartpain.

as luck would have it. he's at nanyang now O_O. PCME course which is quite v diff from BCM. now it's jus a wave hi and bye if we happen to meet..

"isn’t it just amazing how people come into your life, and then leave, and it was as if all that you shared didn’t exist."
sarongpartygirl

how true. just as it with my ex-s..

nice nice nice?

haha. was getting bored of the old layout which was getting kinda too busy/complex n colours, gaudy so yeah =)

this layout's based on a saccharine sweet scribble i did using ballpoint pen and coloured rather shabbily in photoshop (thou tt was kinda the desired watercolourish outcome i wanted anyway haha) yes i know there're lots of boo-boos in the pic so there's no need to point them out ;)

started it at 23may 3+am-6.30am(which was when i went back to sleep). continued from 10-12am+. sometimes i really feel like the result's so simple that it shldnt warrent so long hour put in and i wonder what i was doing lol..

it was gonna be a pink layout originally but it wasnt really me so i changed the heart to the current autunm leaf n viola we get what u see.. oh yeah. this layout has something which u can play w ^_^.a last minute thing that striked me.. i like the effect lots! i dont think i've ever seen it used this way in other layouts..

in a nutshell - i adore this layout =) (^^; bhb sounding)

how'd u guys find it? (comment preferred over tagging ^_^)

EDIT:
mayb i shld give background info on them

ah, the poor girl... she was born with only one hand!!! so from then on, she always attached a bunch of bananas, PEELED, mind you, (she always makes sure there's only FIVE in that bunch of cos, after the incident when she used a bunch w six! when the extra finger was spotted she excused herself n quickly stuffed one banana into her mouth and came back and sputter "u ockeye lahb, onbly hab five bingers!") to her stump of a arm.

both the guy and the gal have the same colour hair *gasp* are they siblings, as in autumn in my heart?! nah. they used the same hair dye la ^_^

Held out like a lightsaber, ready for action whenever the doors were thrown open..

*whosh* the umbrella open n out into the rain. lol.. sheltered this ah ma looking ah ma into the busstop i did.. asked her where she was heading but she reminded me how small my :style umbrella (came w the mag la) was haha.. decided not to pop into esso for wan pao (for grandma to read.. haha i have a liking for elderly cos of my grandma.i do wonder if i'll take stuff for granted if she was in s'pore).

it was pouring ^_^

slisp-slosped in the 1 inch water, clutchin my bag close to me.. the roar of the water in its desperate rush [lol i bet if it rained long enough, the force wld have created a mini waterfall (boy i miss sec1/2 phy geog)] water trickling down my back.. sqush-squash of my shoes..the flash and imminent rumble of thunder. well it wasnt jus a rumble. it was a roar. i could practically feel it..liek stereo turned up too high lol.. flipping of the brolly! and the aiming of it into the wind so it got flipped back ^_^..

reached home w back of shirt soak (lol i must learn how to hold umbrellas properly!) n skirt w a gradient not unlike ms (maths)(zhss) tan's pink deniem skirt.. mom was there at the door but w/o the towel.. the commerial--"*世上只有妈妈好...* gal runs outta bus into the rain into mom who has towel ready.. mom presents Fernleaf milk" bluff one! lol.

sometimes, i watch the rain. watching it start. the crazy wind. the calm before the storm. the red of the clay-ish tile change colour drop by drop b4 turning into a solid deep earthbrown. the leaves getting their asses kicked by the wind..
sometimes, i watch at night. by the stairways window or mom's room. the faint smell of rain in the cool breeze (not the other smelly rain smell). lighting, illuminating the sky. frm velvet to a burst of white and it's day for a split second. sometimes i watch objects instead of the sky. the harsh shadows lighting creates. sometimes it seems like everything's jus a set from the movie. the trees, cars, fence all look fake.

some very rare times when i aint sleep on the way to school, i watch the rain when in kinho's mom's car which is a sedan (nissan sunny!).. i would be in the back row, watching the warm orange glow of the street lights cast everchanging images of the waterdroplet on the front seats and on my hands lol.

try watching the rain sometimes.. =)

well. watching and being in the rain pretty different. this is the wettest i've gotten in the rain and it's still not very wet lol. i wonder if rain's just a novality lol.

i started watchin rain when i was sleeping in the other room, with my bed against the wall, beneath the window (the eaves of the roof hang beyond so i dont get wet lah). whenever it rained, i would be pressing against the refreshingly cool, cool wall.. the curtains would bellow outwards, directed the wind down at me.. loved the rain. well. bed aint there anymore, what a waste of rain.

well the day started horrible with me sleeping at 2am w/o doing what i was supposed to do - a chinese AO paper, bio enzymes tut (which she didnt go thru today!) and gp (which she caught chickenpox!). waking up heavy.. but not really bad. i jus remember the reason for my feathers being so easily ruffles/irriatated at every lil thing/bad moodness. i was in sch early (7am) w only a a stationary mosiac model of ppl (stationary ppl scattered randomly across the grandstand) i choose a step, plonked my self down n promply slept. and very rudely awaking by a grp of friends (not my friends. the grp of ppl were friends) singing happy bday and stuff. i was practically srrounded cos the bday ppl choose to sit right next to me. cannot see ppl sleeping ah?! scream la. talk la. >_< (yes i know it sounds unreasonable of me to rant abt them la but heck. my blog.)

5th floor classroom so we tried the lift but it came packed so had to wait for the nxt one. we and some others students and a teacher or 2 got in almost fillin it. then like 2/3/4 teachers hurried over. some got out to make space ( so there was like more than enuff space lor) but no one of them wanted all of us out >_< blah.

then mr ong said no tutorial, go lib study. we climbed p 4 storeys to find the lib closed n the class not there. after sweating it out there for a while we decided to head to class la. i set out to try complete my chinese which was freaking hard loh (dunno how i'm gonna pass chinese X_X). june at the other table tried to pass, rudely forcin her way but ramin against my chair(oh yeah all chairs had wheels). let it pass. but it happened like trice! i pushed her chair hard. saw shocked expression of ppl at her table but being the ppl we are, not liking to see ugly/awkward scenes joked how childish we were (lol quite naturally la cos june kinda xiao mei mei kinda n i oso kinda childish) but was really pissed. surprisingly, xiao ying realised. must be lack of response when spoken too and no lame stuff being sprouted by me lol

i havent felt so annoyed (to put it mildly) since forever!<-- i want to stress that hor. i aintlike that all the time. I had a hurtful comment/retort (which i kept to myself duh) for every unfortunate line i heard being utter..yelled at some friends (thou there were lines like hurry up! and shut up la(when lames stuff utter)<-- ok tt was rude). felt evil but boy i still was angry w the whole world. all becos of lack of sleep, undone homework (so i thought) and now i realise, mostly cos of some strangers (who didnt mean it). mayb it's that time of the month soon! lol. anyway. was back to self somewhere through the chem tut (which was free period la)

yeah. this long grandfather's story is to remind my self not to like such a wave of badmoodiness take over me. and to question myself why i feel as such. wahaha. so can be errm. better prepared for any.. surprises. my friends shldnt suffer cos of my wanting to pick a bone.

oh yeah. after chinese oral, the teacher asked if she could ask a private qn. she then asked if i was "pan4 ni4". and of cos i didnt understand her qn lol. she said pan ni = rebellious. orh...but no what. i aint rebellious. sharks. i think relief teacher complained i didnt hand in all the homework loh^^;. aiyah. jus kinda wierd n out of the blue, the qn.

it's not 19may today actually. i'm continuing the draft from yest.. actually.. there was lots of stuff i had wanted to blog abt..another time perhpas.

today i was telling mom abt how lisa (already there) and celest (there june) both going trinity university (melburne).. kinda jus a random thingy la cos quite coincidantal their both going there?

she was like "why? u want go there arh" haha i dont know la..

anyway, she said she n dad's aiming for me to got england. gonna get british citizenship thingy done in june. was born there u see.. so hopefully can get home students rate. (i dont think can cos have to be there for 3 years before can. by right shld take a lvl there den it'll work out..she said they'll try get on that charge me as home student)

i didnt really know of these plans.. originally, from young i have always thought i'll go university overseas cos my parents did.(it didnt even occur to me singapore had universities lol. it's like believin the earth's flat from young) had wanted to too, actually cos seems like fun.. then recently like last year or soemthing,i want to try get into singaore uni cos what about siblings? will hv enough cash or not? if can make in in singapore, why not..

but then dad's friend's son who had four aces had applied twice for medical course and they didnt even ask him to come for the interview which meant no chances at all. four aces. not that i want to make med course, just want to illustrate the competition's really tough, what's more with me taking only 3 subjects and being in the dragon year. the year that jammed up the JAE servers lol

yeah.. so it's like.. limited time left here. suddenly felt like i should treasure every moment i have with my family and friends.. perhaps in two years time i wont be around (physically).. 2 more birthdays here (yes this yr's one approaching ^_^)[i'm kinda sorry my bday's coming lol..cos i do realise it's hard to get me gifts (and i dont really like buying n thinkin of bday gifts for others [or myself for tt matter lol]).(arg. i cant find anymore examples to show how short 2 yrs is) but then all this is speculation.. nothing's concrete.

familywise things are fantastic. i love my family. i think it rocks. we get on well, have fun, laugh. me n mom likeminded n quite close. ok w dad n sis =). likeminded w bro (he likes to read;me i just go get caught for reading under the table all the time lol.i origamis,he origamis. both quite lame. lol.. just on saturday, we spent the afternoon throwing flapping paper planes. they fly damn well. and they can flap their wings if u havent guessed lol).

friends are great thou i regret i'm not actively keepin in contact with tricia or vanda. i had better do something about it. it's very nice me and cui and mingfen are still get to meet so often cos we're all in ny. my class is really nice. i dont dislike anyone at all. really fun n likeable class.only 6 boys thou lol!

yes, things are going very well for me. i feel really fortunate. and it's the people around me who makes it so, so thank you all =).

remember these? they who invade our green pastures and disappeared jus as suddenly as they appeared?



not before making sure they'll got offsprings...



keep your eyes peel for any suspicious colourful calves.

hm. they're cows aren't they? yet they're got horns. and no udders. colour gay cows they are.

phew. we're quite safe then =)

via cowboy caleb

Wistful.

Every weekend that does eventually come by.
Somehow end up thinking of you.
Like you i don’t even know why I do.
Echoes are what might have been still ringing, perhaps.
Yesterday will always be but enigma .

bleh.
(copied from a madagascar postcard btw)(mouseover it)(colourin sucks lol)(shape of molecules notes! haha)(well truth to be told, in place of "CCJC" i put "NO STEAK?!" n a lil scribble of a piece of steak. when i came to drawin the NYC of the flag i added the J and erased the steak haha.. so i'm not tt loyal to the sch haha)

it's be nyjc all decades what. why fix what's not brokened? i rmb they told us to banish all thoughts of the uniform being changed cos it's been as such all these years. and then. they're gonna change the name NYJC to CCJC. sissyjc -_-. sounds horrid. but worst it's like. no more nanyang jc. gone. the graduate said the board of directors have already decided on it. hope the petition works :S

i think there'll be a big uproar when they annouce it. Prolly "boos". i imgine the chanting/cheering of "N(clap)- Y(clap)- J..C(clap chap)~". and then we sit on the track in protest, refusing to bulge. (perhaps cos we dont wanna proceed to attempt our midyr paper! lol)

shadows (of branches/leaves) on umbrella are nice. i mean, when you're holding the umbrella under the blazing sun (boy it was freaking hot today).

a rare short post. lol.

long long time ago, when i was young

okok, not that young..

long long time ago, when i was young


i experienced my first brush of "love" ^^;;

i was what, pri 2/3 n had a interest in origami. quite a number of ppl in my class did too so we kinda fuelled each other's interest haha..we usually folded before flagraising.. wahhaa. supposed to be "silent reading session"

there was this guy and we used to spend recess together, teachin each other origami haha(like some model i cldnt do n some he didnt).. one day while walking along the corridor (nxt to the xing shui shi yuan rock!)he tried hold my hand (!!) me being the shy lil gal i was (was prolly shocked mayb), slipped my hand out but he tried again n i didnt do anything haha (i'm not sure if i did the slip my hand out thingy really happened or it was me dramatising stuff when i wrote it my diary a few yrs after it happened. i dont recall what really happened now, except where we were haha).. i dont remember that i felt then too haha..

looking back it was all pretty cute, two kids holding hands, walking around/folding 60cents colourpaper frm the bookshop.. haha we talktalktalked lots during chinese lesson when we all sat on the floor to listen to the chinese teacher (mayb tt's y my chinese so crappy lol)

his mom used to be at the parent's corner sheleter place..mayb bring lunch. i remember she told me not to buy stuff for him. lol. we was quite silly, buyin stuff frm the bookshop tt he wanted (it was kinda vice versa actually)..

i used to pretend he died to cry for fun (o_0 cry for fun sounds really wierd)..lol. lucky mom didnt like walk into my room when i was crying. [once i was on the phone with yun qing (another classmate) and imagined the worst fates that those puppies in school would be destined too (knocked down by cars la etc) and we wld cry. mus look v wierd, two gals crying on the phone at some makebelieve scenrio lol. btw no we werent sick sadistic ppl. we loved those puppies. but that''l be another story haha.]

i think we talked so much that the teacher split us to one right at the back and one at the front. but both on the extreme left of the class, next to the two doors... so we used to say "teacher, can go toilet?" den on the way, stop by the door to chitchat a while lol!

was it love? i did like him n stuff i dunno. when i hear of primary school students having steads, i always think it's ridiculous- "so young know what is love meh? haiyo, they all arh, watch too much tv". but there i was. haha.. ^^; the irony. i do know it was very innocent and rather sweet hee.

i think around pri4, one day he said "i dont wan friend you anymore". wah.. xin tong arh. i think he wanted to play/run around w his guy friends n stuff..

then pri4 changed class loh. i think i watched him play tabletennis sometimes haha. and gave him my extra spiderman stickers (i had this spidybook thingy.. hv to collect stickers which come randomised in packs n paste it in.. so of cos lots of extras. yeah, i love spiderman as a kid[cos he wasnt like other heros who were born w abilites- more real (thou how real can superheros be aint lol)]. n he's super witty. and he's smart. he invented his webshooters k]. well i still read the bimonthly comics haha.)

totally lost contact after pri school.

towards the end of sec 4 in popular jubilee, i saw a familiar person reading the doublesize spiderman comics (diff frm the series i read thou haha). my heart skipped at beat, seeing him doing something that links so close to the past. it was the first time i saw in him what, 6 years. wow. lol. he looked the same except he had grown so tall(well compared to my mental image of a pri 3 boy). he still remembered my name. "emily" yes. my name's emily. lol. flustered me mumbled some rubbish n left w/o exchanging contact number. boy i was dumb. nvr again to see him liao.

then. the next day at the library, mugging for the o lvls. guess who i was to meet. yes. after not meeting him for 6 years, i meet him 2day in a row. he was w friends.. i could feel them talking abt me.. u know, can see them sneakin look and nudgin him when i left seat etc.

that day was a very unproductive day of studying (how to study.. lol) so i decided to leave early. on the way out i popped by his table to say bye n he asked my number =D (like finally lol). exchanged a few sms (he said wanted to catch me outside for a short chat but i came over first and says he thinks we used to do origami last time) but after a while he didnt reply o_0.(later he said he had ran out of the month's free sms -_-;)

so that was that.. for a week or so, he studied at amk then disappears as suddenly as he appeared.

i wonder if he remembered us in primary school. a classmate once told me she had a very close friend who took the same sch bus at her in pri sch but didnt recall a thing (he was in her sec3/4 class..). ah. heartpain.

as luck would have it. he's at nanyang now O_O. PCME course which is quite v diff from BCM. now it's jus a wave hi and bye if we happen to meet..

"isn’t it just amazing how people come into your life, and then leave, and it was as if all that you shared didn’t exist."
sarongpartygirl

how true. just as it with my ex-s..

nice nice nice?

haha. was getting bored of the old layout which was getting kinda too busy/complex n colours, gaudy so yeah =)

this layout's based on a saccharine sweet scribble i did using ballpoint pen and coloured rather shabbily in photoshop (thou tt was kinda the desired watercolourish outcome i wanted anyway haha) yes i know there're lots of boo-boos in the pic so there's no need to point them out ;)

started it at 23may 3+am-6.30am(which was when i went back to sleep). continued from 10-12am+. sometimes i really feel like the result's so simple that it shldnt warrent so long hour put in and i wonder what i was doing lol..

it was gonna be a pink layout originally but it wasnt really me so i changed the heart to the current autunm leaf n viola we get what u see.. oh yeah. this layout has something which u can play w ^_^.a last minute thing that striked me.. i like the effect lots! i dont think i've ever seen it used this way in other layouts..

in a nutshell - i adore this layout =) (^^; bhb sounding)

how'd u guys find it? (comment preferred over tagging ^_^)

EDIT:
mayb i shld give background info on them

ah, the poor girl... she was born with only one hand!!! so from then on, she always attached a bunch of bananas, PEELED, mind you, (she always makes sure there's only FIVE in that bunch of cos, after the incident when she used a bunch w six! when the extra finger was spotted she excused herself n quickly stuffed one banana into her mouth and came back and sputter "u ockeye lahb, onbly hab five bingers!") to her stump of a arm.

both the guy and the gal have the same colour hair *gasp* are they siblings, as in autumn in my heart?! nah. they used the same hair dye la ^_^

Held out like a lightsaber, ready for action whenever the doors were thrown open..

*whosh* the umbrella open n out into the rain. lol.. sheltered this ah ma looking ah ma into the busstop i did.. asked her where she was heading but she reminded me how small my :style umbrella (came w the mag la) was haha.. decided not to pop into esso for wan pao (for grandma to read.. haha i have a liking for elderly cos of my grandma.i do wonder if i'll take stuff for granted if she was in s'pore).

it was pouring ^_^

slisp-slosped in the 1 inch water, clutchin my bag close to me.. the roar of the water in its desperate rush [lol i bet if it rained long enough, the force wld have created a mini waterfall (boy i miss sec1/2 phy geog)] water trickling down my back.. sqush-squash of my shoes..the flash and imminent rumble of thunder. well it wasnt jus a rumble. it was a roar. i could practically feel it..liek stereo turned up too high lol.. flipping of the brolly! and the aiming of it into the wind so it got flipped back ^_^..

reached home w back of shirt soak (lol i must learn how to hold umbrellas properly!) n skirt w a gradient not unlike ms (maths)(zhss) tan's pink deniem skirt.. mom was there at the door but w/o the towel.. the commerial--"*世上只有妈妈好...* gal runs outta bus into the rain into mom who has towel ready.. mom presents Fernleaf milk" bluff one! lol.

sometimes, i watch the rain. watching it start. the crazy wind. the calm before the storm. the red of the clay-ish tile change colour drop by drop b4 turning into a solid deep earthbrown. the leaves getting their asses kicked by the wind..
sometimes, i watch at night. by the stairways window or mom's room. the faint smell of rain in the cool breeze (not the other smelly rain smell). lighting, illuminating the sky. frm velvet to a burst of white and it's day for a split second. sometimes i watch objects instead of the sky. the harsh shadows lighting creates. sometimes it seems like everything's jus a set from the movie. the trees, cars, fence all look fake.

some very rare times when i aint sleep on the way to school, i watch the rain when in kinho's mom's car which is a sedan (nissan sunny!).. i would be in the back row, watching the warm orange glow of the street lights cast everchanging images of the waterdroplet on the front seats and on my hands lol.

try watching the rain sometimes.. =)

well. watching and being in the rain pretty different. this is the wettest i've gotten in the rain and it's still not very wet lol. i wonder if rain's just a novality lol.

i started watchin rain when i was sleeping in the other room, with my bed against the wall, beneath the window (the eaves of the roof hang beyond so i dont get wet lah). whenever it rained, i would be pressing against the refreshingly cool, cool wall.. the curtains would bellow outwards, directed the wind down at me.. loved the rain. well. bed aint there anymore, what a waste of rain.

well the day started horrible with me sleeping at 2am w/o doing what i was supposed to do - a chinese AO paper, bio enzymes tut (which she didnt go thru today!) and gp (which she caught chickenpox!). waking up heavy.. but not really bad. i jus remember the reason for my feathers being so easily ruffles/irriatated at every lil thing/bad moodness. i was in sch early (7am) w only a a stationary mosiac model of ppl (stationary ppl scattered randomly across the grandstand) i choose a step, plonked my self down n promply slept. and very rudely awaking by a grp of friends (not my friends. the grp of ppl were friends) singing happy bday and stuff. i was practically srrounded cos the bday ppl choose to sit right next to me. cannot see ppl sleeping ah?! scream la. talk la. >_< (yes i know it sounds unreasonable of me to rant abt them la but heck. my blog.)

5th floor classroom so we tried the lift but it came packed so had to wait for the nxt one. we and some others students and a teacher or 2 got in almost fillin it. then like 2/3/4 teachers hurried over. some got out to make space ( so there was like more than enuff space lor) but no one of them wanted all of us out >_< blah.

then mr ong said no tutorial, go lib study. we climbed p 4 storeys to find the lib closed n the class not there. after sweating it out there for a while we decided to head to class la. i set out to try complete my chinese which was freaking hard loh (dunno how i'm gonna pass chinese X_X). june at the other table tried to pass, rudely forcin her way but ramin against my chair(oh yeah all chairs had wheels). let it pass. but it happened like trice! i pushed her chair hard. saw shocked expression of ppl at her table but being the ppl we are, not liking to see ugly/awkward scenes joked how childish we were (lol quite naturally la cos june kinda xiao mei mei kinda n i oso kinda childish) but was really pissed. surprisingly, xiao ying realised. must be lack of response when spoken too and no lame stuff being sprouted by me lol

i havent felt so annoyed (to put it mildly) since forever!<-- i want to stress that hor. i aintlike that all the time. I had a hurtful comment/retort (which i kept to myself duh) for every unfortunate line i heard being utter..yelled at some friends (thou there were lines like hurry up! and shut up la(when lames stuff utter)<-- ok tt was rude). felt evil but boy i still was angry w the whole world. all becos of lack of sleep, undone homework (so i thought) and now i realise, mostly cos of some strangers (who didnt mean it). mayb it's that time of the month soon! lol. anyway. was back to self somewhere through the chem tut (which was free period la)

yeah. this long grandfather's story is to remind my self not to like such a wave of badmoodiness take over me. and to question myself why i feel as such. wahaha. so can be errm. better prepared for any.. surprises. my friends shldnt suffer cos of my wanting to pick a bone.

oh yeah. after chinese oral, the teacher asked if she could ask a private qn. she then asked if i was "pan4 ni4". and of cos i didnt understand her qn lol. she said pan ni = rebellious. orh...but no what. i aint rebellious. sharks. i think relief teacher complained i didnt hand in all the homework loh^^;. aiyah. jus kinda wierd n out of the blue, the qn.

it's not 19may today actually. i'm continuing the draft from yest.. actually.. there was lots of stuff i had wanted to blog abt..another time perhpas.

today i was telling mom abt how lisa (already there) and celest (there june) both going trinity university (melburne).. kinda jus a random thingy la cos quite coincidantal their both going there?

she was like "why? u want go there arh" haha i dont know la..

anyway, she said she n dad's aiming for me to got england. gonna get british citizenship thingy done in june. was born there u see.. so hopefully can get home students rate. (i dont think can cos have to be there for 3 years before can. by right shld take a lvl there den it'll work out..she said they'll try get on that charge me as home student)

i didnt really know of these plans.. originally, from young i have always thought i'll go university overseas cos my parents did.(it didnt even occur to me singapore had universities lol. it's like believin the earth's flat from young) had wanted to too, actually cos seems like fun.. then recently like last year or soemthing,i want to try get into singaore uni cos what about siblings? will hv enough cash or not? if can make in in singapore, why not..

but then dad's friend's son who had four aces had applied twice for medical course and they didnt even ask him to come for the interview which meant no chances at all. four aces. not that i want to make med course, just want to illustrate the competition's really tough, what's more with me taking only 3 subjects and being in the dragon year. the year that jammed up the JAE servers lol

yeah.. so it's like.. limited time left here. suddenly felt like i should treasure every moment i have with my family and friends.. perhaps in two years time i wont be around (physically).. 2 more birthdays here (yes this yr's one approaching ^_^)[i'm kinda sorry my bday's coming lol..cos i do realise it's hard to get me gifts (and i dont really like buying n thinkin of bday gifts for others [or myself for tt matter lol]).(arg. i cant find anymore examples to show how short 2 yrs is) but then all this is speculation.. nothing's concrete.

familywise things are fantastic. i love my family. i think it rocks. we get on well, have fun, laugh. me n mom likeminded n quite close. ok w dad n sis =). likeminded w bro (he likes to read;me i just go get caught for reading under the table all the time lol.i origamis,he origamis. both quite lame. lol.. just on saturday, we spent the afternoon throwing flapping paper planes. they fly damn well. and they can flap their wings if u havent guessed lol).

friends are great thou i regret i'm not actively keepin in contact with tricia or vanda. i had better do something about it. it's very nice me and cui and mingfen are still get to meet so often cos we're all in ny. my class is really nice. i dont dislike anyone at all. really fun n likeable class.only 6 boys thou lol!

yes, things are going very well for me. i feel really fortunate. and it's the people around me who makes it so, so thank you all =).

remember these? they who invade our green pastures and disappeared jus as suddenly as they appeared?



not before making sure they'll got offsprings...



keep your eyes peel for any suspicious colourful calves.

hm. they're cows aren't they? yet they're got horns. and no udders. colour gay cows they are.

phew. we're quite safe then =)

via cowboy caleb

Wistful.

Every weekend that does eventually come by.
Somehow end up thinking of you.
Like you i don’t even know why I do.
Echoes are what might have been still ringing, perhaps.
Yesterday will always be but enigma .